Another rest day!
Instead of beating up my body, I focused on my mind. But rather than beating it up I tried to exercise it in a gentler fashion. I went to visit my old friend and counsellor, and received some of her wisdom.
She tells me I absolutely need to let go of some control. Particularly because of my years of work where I could make autocratic decisions at will, I am a control freak.
She tells me I need to be a little tougher on myself. I need to be stronger. I need to be a leader. If I want to stop worrying obsessively about things I can't control, that means a little more self discipline in my story writing is called for. No more imagining the worst just because I can.
She says I have a naturally addictive personality. It's not a wonder that my offspring has such tendencies. She say's it's fine that I use exercise instead of drugs to control depression, but she doesn't want to see me out there riding my bike for 8 hours, or it's just another addiction.....hmmmm
She says I need to worry less about my lost sheep, and nurture the ones living healthy lives. It's still okay to reach out to the lost ones, but don't try to force something that ain't there.
She also said I'm a good guy and that when I think I've screwed up, or when others think I've screwed up, that I need to accept it but move on. As insane as it seems it's possible to feel guilt even when you don't think you screwed up...and that is indeed non value added.
She says I need to allow my self limited time each day to feel sorry for myself, and than get my ass in gear. This kinda ties in with the getting a little tougher notion.
And she gave me a hug!!!
"Nothing is so strong as gentleness, nothing so gentle as real strength."---St Frances de Sales
Love
Peter
Instead of beating up my body, I focused on my mind. But rather than beating it up I tried to exercise it in a gentler fashion. I went to visit my old friend and counsellor, and received some of her wisdom.
She tells me I absolutely need to let go of some control. Particularly because of my years of work where I could make autocratic decisions at will, I am a control freak.
She tells me I need to be a little tougher on myself. I need to be stronger. I need to be a leader. If I want to stop worrying obsessively about things I can't control, that means a little more self discipline in my story writing is called for. No more imagining the worst just because I can.
She says I have a naturally addictive personality. It's not a wonder that my offspring has such tendencies. She say's it's fine that I use exercise instead of drugs to control depression, but she doesn't want to see me out there riding my bike for 8 hours, or it's just another addiction.....hmmmm
She says I need to worry less about my lost sheep, and nurture the ones living healthy lives. It's still okay to reach out to the lost ones, but don't try to force something that ain't there.
She also said I'm a good guy and that when I think I've screwed up, or when others think I've screwed up, that I need to accept it but move on. As insane as it seems it's possible to feel guilt even when you don't think you screwed up...and that is indeed non value added.
She says I need to allow my self limited time each day to feel sorry for myself, and than get my ass in gear. This kinda ties in with the getting a little tougher notion.
And she gave me a hug!!!
"Nothing is so strong as gentleness, nothing so gentle as real strength."---St Frances de Sales
Love
Peter
So awesome Pete! Love you immeasurably!!
ReplyDeleteAgree with Elly totally!
ReplyDeleteLove, gail